Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I am one with the molecules
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Randomize
