YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Found the puke drawer
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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