i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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