I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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