2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
did i walk over a car last night?
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
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