I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
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