In America we eat man semen.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize