I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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