if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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