That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
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