no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Randomize
