piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize