Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
