3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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