just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Rumble strips road head = magical
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I party with great urgency now.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
