I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
