Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
