well most of my day revolves around power hour
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize