i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I skipped work to stalk him.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
