out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
