Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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