i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
