just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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