My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
