I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
