standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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