No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
