ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
