Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I need to calm my uterus...
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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