my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize