dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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