nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Randomize
