turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
What drink are we having for lunch?
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
