What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
