i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
