there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
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It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
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What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
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