i don't like sucking hair
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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