Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
