I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Your penis caused this!
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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