Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE