I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
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