I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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