that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Randomize
