Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Randomize
