all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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