I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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