so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize