I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
