There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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