My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
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