how can u be prego again
Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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