I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
