I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
this will be a night to untag.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize